i had some friends over and me and my friend greg were in the bathtub together. i had really bad cramps and finally something big fell out of me and the cramps stopped. i looked into the clear water and saw a bundle of something. i was afraid to look more because i didn't want greg to see. but finally i did, and it was a baby that i thought was dead. as soon as i took it out though, it was like it reactivated because it started breathing again. greg started going crazy and demanding who the father was. i told him i had never had sex before so this couldn't be a baby, this must have been a mistake. besides, the "baby" didn't have an umbilical cord or a placenta. i was afraid for anyone to see the baby, so i found a little carseat for him and took him outside in the meantime.
i went downstairs and talked with my parents for awhile, who were watching television. i had no idea how they could be so calm even though i was going crazy inside. i wonder how they would react about the baby. i went outside and greg and my friends were still out there. i don't remember if i had waited for them to leave before i took the baby over behind my house, that part is kind of blurry. but i started feeding the baby with milk from my fridge, and my next-door neighbour was watching me but i didn't seem to mind because she was smiling. the baby was smiling and cooing and looked so happy. i reached in and felt where the baby's belly button was supposed to be, but all i felt was this giant loud spark. i jumped back, and thought about how i would get rid of it. i couldn't keep the baby. i couldn't let anyone know about the baby.
i thought about leaving it on someone's door step. it was a warm night so the baby wouldn't likely freeze. i thought about starving it. i thought about smothering it. i was about to kill the baby when i woke up.
